Terms & Conditions
The boring legal stuff is handled by actual lawyers. This page is about how we actually work together. Think of it as a "don't be difficult and neither will we" agreement.
Written in English, not Legalese. You're welcome.
The Basic Deal
We'll be professional, honest, and fair. You be the same. That's literally it. Everything else is just details.
What We Promise You
Our side of the bargain. Hold us to it.
We'll Be Honest
If we can't fix it, we'll tell you. If it's not worth fixing, we'll tell you that too. No point throwing money at a lost cause.
We'll Be Transparent on Price
You'll know what you're paying before we start. No mysterious 'shop fees' or 'diagnostic charges' that appear on the final bill.
We'll Show Up When We Say
If we say 2pm, we mean 2pm. Not 'sometime between 9 and 5'. If we're running late or stuck on another job, we'll actually call and tell you. No ghosting.
We'll Speak English
Not mechanic-speak designed to confuse you into paying more. We'll explain what's wrong in words you understand.
We'll Stand Behind Our Work
If we fix something and it breaks again because of our work, we'll make it right. That's just basic decency.
We'll Be Pleasant
We're not going to roll our eyes at your questions or make you feel stupid. Cars are complicated. Questions are fine.
What We Ask From You
Your side of the bargain. It's really not much.
Be Honest With Us
Tell us what actually happened. 'It just stopped working' is rarely the full story. The more we know, the faster we fix it.
Don't Call 47 Times
If we don't answer, we're probably under a car. Leave a message. We WILL call you back. Calling 20 more times won't make us answer faster.
Be There When We Arrive
We've driven across Kent to get to you. Please be where you said you'd be. With the car. And the keys.
Pay the Call-Out Fee First
From £50 before we leave (more if you're miles away - petrol costs money, surprisingly). No 'I'll pay when you get here'. No sob stories.
Let Us Work
We know you're curious, but standing 2 inches away asking 'what's that?' every 30 seconds slows everything down.
Tell Us Everything Upfront
Don't wait until we're halfway through to mention 'oh, and the brakes feel funny too'. One job at a time, quoted separately.
"I've Got My Own Parts"
Read this bit carefully. It's important.
You Can Supply Your Own Parts
Sure, you found it cheaper on eBay. That's your choice. We'll fit it.
But We Won't Warranty the Part
We can't guarantee that the part you bought is good, correct, or will actually fit. That's on you.
Call-Out Fee Still Applies
We still drove to you. That call-out fee is still due, even if your part doesn't fit. Petrol doesn't refund itself.
Comeback = Same Price Again
If your cheap part fails and you want us back? Full call-out fee. Full labour rate. Again.
We Don't Install Rubbish
Some parts are so cheap they're basically scrap. We reserve the right to refuse fitting parts that are obviously going to fail.
Doesn't Fit? You Still Pay
If your part doesn't fit or turns out to be broken, you still owe us for the labour. We did our job - we tried to fit it. Not our fault you bought the wrong thing.
The 'Cheap Parts' Warranty
If you insist on cheap parts, here's your warranty: We guarantee the part won't fall off. That's it. How long it lasts? Your problem.
Why We're Like This About Parts
We've fitted too many "brand new" eBay parts that were dead on arrival, wrong fitment, or lasted about 3 days. When you buy from us, we warranty the part. When you bring your own? You're the warranty department.
Honest Truths
Things we could hide but won't because we're not like that.
Not Everything is Hourly
The £60/hour rate doesn't apply to every job. Some work gets quoted as a fixed price - clutches, timing belts, engine swaps. We'll tell you which is which.
ℹ️ Fixed price = fixed price. Hourly = hourly. We'll be clear.
We Use Subcontractors
Sometimes. For specialist work or when we're swamped. They're vetted, insured, and held to our standards. We don't just pass you off to some random bloke.
ℹ️ We'll tell you if someone else is coming instead of us.
We're Not Always Available
We're popular. Shocking, we know. Sometimes you'll have to wait a day or two. Emergency lockouts get priority, your squeaky belt can wait.
ℹ️ Book ahead if you can. Last-minute = longer wait.
We Can Refuse Jobs
If it's dangerous, illegal, or you've been rude to us before - we can say no. We're not obligated to help everyone.
ℹ️ Be nice. It's not hard.
Quotes Are Valid for 7 Days
Parts prices change. Labour estimates are based on current conditions. That quote from 3 months ago? Yeah, that's expired.
ℹ️ Get a fresh quote if it's been a while.
Warranty Has Limits
We warranty our work, not your car's future problems. If your alternator fails 6 months after we changed your oil, that's not on us.
ℹ️ Our work, our responsibility. Everything else, not so much.
Payment is Due on Completion
Not 'next week when I get paid'. Not 'can I owe you?'. When the job is done, we get paid. Card, cash, bank transfer - we're flexible on method, not timing.
ℹ️ We've heard every excuse. Please don't add to the collection.
The Absolute No-Nos
Do any of these and we're done. Seriously.
Lying About What Happened
We'll find out. We always find out. And then we'll charge you for the time wasted.
Haggling After the Job
The price was agreed before we started. Trying to negotiate after is not cool.
Demanding Free Diagnosis
Our knowledge costs money. 'Can you just have a quick look?' is still work.
No-Shows Without Notice
We blocked out time for you. If you can't make it, tell us. 24 hours minimum.
Aggressive or Abusive Behaviour
Instant job termination. We'll leave. You'll still pay for the time spent. Don't be that person.
Trying to Pay Later
We're mechanics, not a bank. No credit. No IOUs. No 'my card's not working, I'll transfer it tomorrow'.
Asking Us to Cut Corners
'Can you just bodge it?' No. We do the job properly or not at all. Our reputation matters.
Pretending You Didn't Get the Quote
We send confirmations. We keep records. 'I didn't know it would cost that much' doesn't fly.
Fair Warning Charges
These are real. We will charge them. Don't test us.
The Liar's Penalty
If you lie about what happened and we waste time because of it, the bill doubles. Fair's fair.
The No-Show Fee
Don't show up, don't call? Full call-out fee charged. We drove there for nothing.
The Runaround Charge
Send us to the wrong address, give us wrong info, make us wait around? That's chargeable.
The Return Trip Fee
If we have to come back because you didn't mention something important the first time. That's a whole new journey, mate.
The Education Fee
We're fixing your alternator and you want us to explain how brakes work? That's a lesson. Lessons cost the same as labour.
The good news? Be a decent human and you'll never see any of these charges. Most of our customers never do.
About the Phone Calls
Let's address this directly
We get it. Your car's broken and you want an answer NOW. But here's the thing:
- • We're probably elbow-deep in an engine
- • Or under a car
- • Or programming a key that can't be interrupted
- • We WILL call you back
- • Leave ONE voicemail
- • Send a text with details
- • Include your car make/model
- • Briefly describe the issue
Real talk: Calling 15 times in 10 minutes doesn't make us answer faster. It just means we have 15 missed calls to clear before we can call anyone back. One call. One message. We've got you.
The Bottom Line
We're just people trying to do good work and make a living. Treat us like humans, we'll treat you like humans. It's really that simple.
95% of our customers are lovely people who we genuinely enjoy helping. This page exists because of the other 5%.
If you're reading this and thinking "who actually does this stuff?" - congratulations, you're in the 95%. We're going to get along fine.